I’ve been (slowly) watching the show The Bear with my husband occasionally on Saturday nights after we put the kids to bed.  If you haven’t seen the show, I highly recommend it.  My husband I both enjoy through our shared appreciation and knowledge of the restaurant industry.  I’ve often thought, if Anthony Bourdain were still alive…he’d love this show.  R.I.P.

The lead character, Carmen “Carmy” is a talented chef who left his hometown and dysfunctional family for greener pastures and to make a name for himself.  After his brother’s unexpected death he finds himself back home, and muddling his way through his brother’s “mess” of a beef sandwich local spot.  In an attempt to make something of himself and realize his potential, he and his motley crew of misfits piece together an aspiring Michelin star rated restaurant, “The Bear”.  All funded by his Uncle who shows up every other episode impatiently demanding to see profit being turned.

Last week we got a glimpse into the life of Tina, one of the line chefs.  In other episodes we have seen that she isn’t the most confident in her cooking abilities.  You always had a feeling she was “newer to this” than the others but you never understood why until the last episode.  Her story is like so many people in this country.  Struggling. Living paycheck to paycheck.  Dutifully and gratefully showing up to whatever job they could find, having no intention of leaving and trying to put food on the table for her kid.  Until one day, her world is rocked when she gets laid off from the candy company she did administrative work after 15 years.  

So what does she do? What any good intending mama would do.  She pulls herself up by the bootstraps, updates her resume, and hits the pavement.  But what she encounters is a world that has changed.  A lot of the establishments that she walks into aren’t even taking resumes.  You need to apply online/through Linkedin now.

So she adapts.  She is resilient, rejection after rejection until finally, after hauling her ass across the city by bus to show up for a job interview posted online, a cold, young, impersonal assistant tells her they already filled the position but didn’t have the decency to take the job posting offline.

Her train back home is delayed so, filled with rage, sadness, desperation and despair, she makes her way across the street to the BEEF sandwich shop.  The place is bustling.  She orders a black coffee which Richie gives to her on the house.  They have an extra sandwich so he gives her that too.

She makes her way to the back room to sit down and proceeds to take a bite and break down.  And what happens next is a scene in which restores my faith in humanity.  We watch Michael pull up a seat next to her and relate.  To her experience in the world.  They swap stories around the worst part of their days, commiserating yet simultaneously appreciating their lives and the fullness of their shared experience.  Despite both being caught up in their own shitstorms, there is an undertone of gratitude and hope for the next generation.  To sum this up, he needs a line cook, and Tina (finally) has a job again.

I love this scene for so many reasons.  Mainly because the restaurant industry has saved me too.  A few times.

The first time was when I moved home from college in 2008 (didn’t know it then but we were right smack in the middle of a global recession) and I got a job at Casa de Bandini so that I could pay my own rent for the first time ever.

The second was when I arrived in SF in 2010 with no money, no shelter, and no plan.  Besides finding a job.  I was hired in the second establishment I walked into in Noe Valley, “The Valley Tavern”. They could use some extra help since the Giants were in the playoffs for the World Series.  (Side note: I was working behind the bar the night they won…memory of a lifetime!)

Then there was Vesuvio, a 70+ year old bar off Columbus next to City Lights Bookstore that Jack Kerouac and other Beatniks from the 70’s used to frequent.  If you like books, it’s iconic, etched into Northbeach folklore.  That cocktail waitress job afforded me the ability to pay off my student loans from hair school with a vengeance.  I even got Zach his job as a caterer at Andros-Rostilij from chatting with a regular there during one shift.

Point is, the restaurant industry has always been there for me when I’m in a pinch.  It’s hard work and requires a lot of hustle and I recommend everyone do it at some point in their lifetime.  I will definitely be encouraging my kids when they are old enough.  Plus, I don’t think robots will be pouring our drinks or serving us our food anytime soon.  God, I hope not.

The service industry teaches you hustle, grit, the importance of hard work, manual labor.  You get your hands dirty (literally) but more importantly, cash money in your pocket at the end of your shift.  You also receive the added benefit of camaraderie with people from all different walks of life with their own rich histories and lived experiences.  I think it’s so important to get out of our silos and build relationships/interact with people who are different from us.  What usually ensues is new friends and good times, mixed in with a side of debauchery.  A life worth living.

So cheers to the service industry.  Don’t forget to tip your waiter next time you enjoy a meal out! 

With gratitude,

The Layoff Queen