The genesis of “The Layoff Queen” begins (in part) with a spiritual session I had with a medium Jessica Rachel, where a beautiful fairy spirit guide showed up and confirmed that part of my purpose with this business was to give people a beautiful permission slip.

How perfect.  This resonated with me deeply because I strongly identify with the person who has to ask permission first (versus forgiveness).  I’ve always been slightly envious of the people who asked for forgiveness over permission.  These folks, it seemed, have such a strong sense and connection with themselves, they have no regard for signs such as “trespassing” or “stay off cliff” or “out of order”.  Practically, they seem to not abide by the predescribed rules society bestows upon us.  Graduate college.  Go get a good paying job.  Contribute to a 401k.  These types of people make decisions for themselves and if along the way, they get a ‘hey, that restroom is for customers only! It says so on the sign!” They simply shrug and say “Sorry!” On their way out to the sound of the toilet flushing.  

I am not one of those people.

When I was thinking about signing up for hair school I needed as many permission slips that I could collect.  I needed permission from friends, current coworkers at Twitter, my parents, anyone other than myself to confirm for me what I already knew to be true.  That I had this fire burning inside of me and desire to try this thing out and if I didn’t, a small part of me would die.

And then, when that flame had burnt out, and I had to leave the salon that I was about to finish up my apprenticeship program with, I again needed permission.  This time to quit.  I vividly remember walking down Kearny street in San Francisco talking to my mom on the phone, sharing how much every part of me did not want to work at this salon anymore and that I was thinking about quitting.  And she gave me permission.  Without any hesitation.  It was like she had full faith and trust in my decision.  Trusted my intuition more than I did. 

Hell, even when I was in labor with my daughter Olive, (who I knew was going to be a “large for gestational age baby” – thank you extra ultrasounds and geriatric pregnancy!) I had to ask permission from my husband to get an epidural!  What the heck?  Like I didn’t know my own body better than anyone else and needed to hand over that sovereignty to someone else.  

Lately, I’ve been thinking about how often we search for those affirmations, those yes’s (or no’s) outside of ourselves, trusting in someone else authority over our own. Why is it that I often find myself needing to ask permission to do something that affects no one other than myself? It’s the stuff that no one else can truly grant permission for where I find myself needing permission the most.  Often, this comes up in my work life or in matters pertaining to work.

So please allow me to be the permission granter for you.  I enjoy this role much better than the reverse.  Here are the rules. 

1. Identify something you feel you need to ask permission to do.  

Examples:

• I really want to take a ukulele class but I’ve never played an instrument before. 
• I’m curious what my coworkers’ role entails but I’m nervous to ask if I could set up a coffee chat to pick her brain about it.
• I’ve always wanted to manage people but I’m not sure I’m cut out for it and scared that I could fail.

2. Be specific. 

Remember,  “the universal is always hunting for a particular.”

3. Email your permission slip to thelayoffqueen@gmail.com.

Allow me to be your personal fairy spirit guide and stamp a giant “Permission granted!” approval on your request!

With gratitude,

The Layoff Queen